Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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