I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Randomize
