I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
