It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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