The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
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