What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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