YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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