Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
