That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
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