dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
