we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
