whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
you had me at cake vodka
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
