Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
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