I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Randomize
