So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
