so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
