About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
