Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I am available for nakedness
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
