The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
