Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
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