Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
