he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
as a side note pls kill me
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
