i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
