My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
