the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
