He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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