I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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