It's like God shit irony all over that family
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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