Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
