you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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