Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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