Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
