so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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