I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Randomize
