yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
MIDGETS
????
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
