Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
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