I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
