when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Randomize
