I think I am morally bankrupt
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
