Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
