It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
false alarm, still single
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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