I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You ruined the universe
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
