i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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