Im at strip club and am horny
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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