There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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