I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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