He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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