Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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