Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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