I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Randomize
