apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
